How Senior Living Allows Couples To Stay Together, Even With Different Care Needs

If you’re living with a spouse or partner who has a medical condition or cognitive decline, it can feel like you don’t have any option other than to shift from the role of partner into that of caregiver. However, being a caregiver for a spouse can be stressful on your relationship as well as your physical and emotional health.

Fortunately, there’s another solution that allows you to lay down your primary caregiver role and lets both of you focus on your wellness. Senior living for couples in a Life Plan Community (also known as a continuing care retirement community or CCRC) can provide the extended assistance and support couples need to remain side by side, even though their health situations are different. 

The Challenges of Caregiving (Even When You’re in Love)

When it comes to caregiving roles in the home, spouses or partners carry the brunt of the workload. While family members and neighbors can certainly pitch in and offer support, spouses are the ones who are there doing most of the daily caregiving tasks.

The Family Caregiver Alliance reports that caregivers who are caring for their spouse put in an average of 44.6 hours per week on caregiving tasks, which can include everything from bathing and dressing to transferring assistance, meal preparation and more. It’s a lot for anyone to take on, but the risk of caregiver fatigue in spouses is much higher than in any other group.

Caregiver fatigue, sometimes called caregiver burnout, is a phenomenon that leaves informal caregivers, such as spouses, at a higher risk for depression, anxiety, sleep disturbances and heart disease. Further, caregiver stress can end up negatively affecting the caregiver’s immune system, leaving them vulnerable to getting sick more often and for far longer.

However, if one spouse moves to assisted living while the other stays at home, that isn’t always the best solution either. Couples want to stay together in senior living, and the worry that they can’t is very real. 

By finding the right option for senior living as a couple, you and your spouse can stay together even when you have different needs. And instead of relying solely on your spouse for care, you will have professional assistance. Research consistently shows that caregiver burnout negatively affects health and relationships and can even trigger chronic illness. Reducing caregiver stress can restore a sense of joy and purpose to your relationship. And living in a Life Plan Community may help reduce any shared anxiety about injuries or illness. 

“At first, I didn’t think moving to a Life Plan Community would be the right fit for us, but the more we researched our options, it became apparent that this was exactly what we needed,” Hezla, a resident of Piedmont Gardens, says. “My husband is receiving the proper care he needs, which gives me great comfort and security. I cannot say enough good things about the support we have received from the Piedmont Gardens team members and other residents.”

The Vital Role of Relationships in Health

Relationships are a key predictor of well-being in every stage of life, and deep connections built on love are essential to a life filled with joy. The connection between two spouses or partners is especially powerful and a predictor of healthy aging. 

Prioritizing your relationship doesn’t just feel good — it’s also good for you. Research consistently shows that our relationships are key to a happy, healthy life. Ongoing social interaction — especially with someone who loves you as deeply as a spouse does — makes life worth living. Married people, especially married men, live longer and healthier lives. 

If one spouse stays at home while the other decides to move to a senior living community, both partners may feel depressed or anxious when they’re no longer together. And this has an incredibly detrimental effect on both partners’ lives. Studies have shown that loneliness and social isolation can increase the risk of dementia by 50%.

Your spouse can keep you active and engaged, encourage you to make new friends, inspire you to pick up a new hobby and give you a powerful incentive to prioritize your health and wellness. Living in the same place — even if one of you has some health challenges — just makes sense. 

Senior Living for Couples: The Life Plan Community Solution

This is where a Life Plan Community can step in as a senior living solution that suits the needs of both people in the partnership. Because Life Plan Communities offer a variety of living options — including independent living, assisted living, skilled nursing and memory support —  right on one campus, spouses can get the personalized assistance they need to feel their best while still visiting daily and spending as much time together as they want. They can eat meals together, go to community events together and entertain family together — all while allowing space for a relationship that is no longer built on caregiving tasks.

As a caregiver to her husband, Marti has received support from both the staff and the entire The Terraces of Phoenix community. This allows her to properly take care of herself while being able to spend quality, stress-free time together with her husband. “We were all put on this Earth to help each other,” she says.

Life Plan Community Care Options

Life Plan Communities offer multiple choices when it comes to different levels of living. Each living option is located on the same campus and is available to residents if the need ever arises. 

Independent Living

Independent living, sometimes called residential living, is for adults who live independently at home without any additional assistance. Independent living is ideal for active adults who are seeking fewer household responsibilities and a vibrant social environment. At a Life Plan Community, it means access to wellness amenities, social opportunities and more.

Because there are fewer housekeeping tasks to take care of, residents are able to take advantage of services that are designed to provide them with more time to pursue their passions. Residents also enjoy a calendar full of social opportunities and events, personalized wellness resources and more. 

Assisted Living

Assisted living features easy access to wellness and social opportunities as well as support with activities of daily living from friendly caregivers. These caregivers offer personalized support based on each person’s unique needs and may be available around the clock if needed.

Residents living in assisted living still enjoy their independence as well as easy access to all of the benefits that come with community living, such as fresh dining, stimulating programming and amenities. Residents in assisted living also enjoy their own private apartments in the community. 

Skilled Nursing

Skilled nursing offers on-site therapy services and complex condition management while still providing personalized touches that make residents feel right at home. Both short-term rehabilitation and long-term care are available as part of skilled nursing.

Short-term skilled nursing is beneficial for those who need short-term rehabilitation services to accelerate their recovery after hospitalization or a procedure. Long-term skilled nursing services are a great option for those who need 24-hour support for a chronic or complex illness. 

Memory Support

Memory support features a homelike and person-centered environment customized to each person’s preferences and history. These specialized neighborhoods are designed especially for those living with a diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease or another type of dementia. 

Team members in memory support communities create personalized plans based on each resident’s interests, preferences and needs to ensure they have as much independence as possible.

Understanding Senior Living Options for Couples: Life Plan Communities vs. Nursing Homes

When exploring your senior living options — especially as a couple — you’ll soon realize your options are abundant! Nursing homes, assisted living and memory-support-only communities are different types of senior living than Life Plan Communities. 

In a Life Plan Community, residents have access to multiple levels of living, including if you and your partner or spouse don’t have the same care needs. This holistic approach prioritizes residents living their best lives — whatever that looks like for them. Life Plan Communities support residents’ health goals and lifestyle with maintenance-free living, delicious meals, exceptional amenities, a full calendar of events and lush, walkable spaces. Plus, support is available to residents as needed.

Nursing homes, on the other hand, are for those who need ongoing nursing care, generally for complex medical conditions, and typically don’t support living arrangements for spouses without care needs. This might mean that you and your partner may not be able to live on the same campus like you would in a Life Plan Community.

Life Plan Communities: A Balance of Independence and Support 

If you’re like most people, your plan might include staying in your family home for as long as possible. For many people, myths about Life Plan Communities can influence their decisions. They may worry about losing decision-making power or feeling bored and trapped. The truth is that Life Plan Communities empower you to live the life you want as you define it.

Learn more about the senior living options available for couples, what communities offer and what to expect with our free resource, The Complete Guide to Life Plan Communities.